Friday, April 22, 2011

'H' for Hypocrite

...Just a note before we begin... this is not aimed at anyone who is currently part of my life, so don't go reading between lines that don't exist, 'capish'?...

I was serving the web yesterday for one thing and, instead, came across the website of an organization that I was once associated with. Thinking back on the experience and reviewing the website now I felt such an irritation rising up in me thinking "YEAH BLOODY RIGHT!!"

If there is one thing that I cannot tolerate it is hypocrites – whether it is a person, or an organization.

I think what makes it worse for me is when they pretend and you can see right through them, but they think that you are fooled. Part of me wants to tell them not to insult my intelligence. I can think of a few other things I want to say as well, but I’m just too polite to utter it. Not only do I think that ‘saying it as it is’ doesn’t always solve a problem. In fact, it can make it worse for all concerned. But that is a whole discussion for another day.

Now, here I am not talking about an honest mistake. I am talking about those who deliberately shy away from truth, tell half truths or deceive for some or other form of selfish gain. Yes, usually it is for a selfish reason; NOT to promote world peace.

What it got me thinking about is how often someone can use modern technology to create a false idea of who they are, what they’re organization is about or the product or service that they represent. How much of what we see is a true representation? How many people then gets caught out only to realize this when it is too late; when they’ve already suffered a financial loss or some other form of injustice or embarrassment. It is almost hard to believe but there are actually people who cheat / deceive others for a living... or is it for greed?

Just a week or two ago I came across (another) so called opportunity to work from home. A company is passed off as offering you an opportunity to do administrative tasks from home and earning an income. They require of you to pay an amount for “training material” which is only sent to you once you’ve deposited the fee. Then you realize that the ‘manual’ “trains” you how to advertise this opportunity – where to advertise it – cover letters and examples of correspondence, etc. The concept is that the more effort you put in, the higher your revenue. In other words: the more people you can trick into paying the fee for the “training material” the higher your revenue, i.e. 10 suckers x R150 = R1,500 revenue. THAT’S IT ! I just don’t have it in me, I tell ya, but a few people out there are millionaires because they don’t think twice about deceiving others for their own gain – no shame!

The same happens when you see a website of a company that looks so wonderful just to discover that whatever they provide is not up to scratch. Then, when that is determined they have the audacity to argue and lie to justify their cause and demand payment. And if you don’t want to pay them, then they’ll steal it from you by cheating you in some other way that you have agreed to – but with a slight twist, e.g. You don’t want to pay me for hours that I have knowingly exceeded on one contract, then they simply book X number of hours extra somewhere else, OR my revenue is a little low this month, so I book 10 hours that I didn’t work and lie about what they’re for, twisting the truth to suit me. Isn’t dishonest plainly DISHONEST! And you’d never guess that looking at their web site! If only people knew...

It kind of puts you in an awkward position when (for instance) you’re suppose to give a reference on someone like that. You want to say they are a lying, cheating son of a gun and that the person or organization should run for the hills, but now you’re required to be “professional”, “discreet”, call it whatever you want – I just want to be honest!!

For this reason it was agreed with one of the companies that I worked for previously that I would rather pass calls along to a higher authority whenever someone phoned asking for a reference for a particular company. I just couldn’t lie without giving it all away.

I’m just sorry: once I know from experience who or what you really are, I simply don’t know how to pretend around it. Faking it is just not my forte. Now surely there have been times when this have worked against me – let’s not make a mistake – but I have had more positive experiences with honesty and integrity. I hope I will always be able to say that.

Does that mean that something bad can’t turn into something good? Of course not! But if it should change I would hope that it can be proved to be authentic.

After all, the proof is in the pudding.

Have you ever been deceived by pretentious deceit like that? Without slandering the person/organization/product, care to share your experience?


  1. I'm never sure if I should be trusting from the beginning and wait for a person to show they shouldnt be distrusting from the start and make people earn my trust. There's problems either way.

    At work, if I'm asked for a reference and I don't have anything nice to say, I'll usually just decline to give one at all. The person usually reads between the lines and figures it out.

  2. Tracy - for sure nowadays trust can be a tricky topic. Unfortunately this particular company had a share in our company's ownership - a well known fact in the market place. Declining a reference was too obvious a message. The two companies were supposed to be as thick as thieves.

    Agree with you - I trust heavily on my gut instinct and I have a fairly good intuition, however, I like to check things out and test whether I'm right or wrong - give them a fair chance, you know. It is a bit like an experiment to test my people skills - I love analyzing personalities - the trick, however, is how vulnerable you make yourself while you're finding out the facts. And of course there's been the times when I got it wrong :( (luckily the exception rather than the rule.) If I have a strong 'no-no' about someone though, I don't stick around to have it proven. One don't always have to learn by making the mistake first.

  3. Yep, there are a lot of sharks out there :(

  4. Best swim with our eyes wide open, Cindy!