Reasons, seasons and lifetimes

Pic borrowed from Upbeats and Downbeats

I'm all for holding on, but if there is one thing I've learned the hard way, it is letting go.

Someone once explained it to me like this: life is like a highway. You're travelling along on your journey and along the way there are on ramps where people join in, and there are off ramps where people split away to continue on their journey separate from you. Perhaps even sometimes you are the one taking an off ramp and separating from those whom you've been travelling with for a while, and entering from an on ramp on someone else's life highway. It is not (usually) personal (well, perhaps sometimes it is), it isn't necessarily your fault, it isn't that there is something wrong with you - ...it just is. This is an ongoing process - it is part of life. The point is everyone is not meant to travel with you for a lifetime.

When I was younger though, I wanted every relationship to be a

Time out toddlers

I thought I was happy with my picture but, clicking without thinking, I lost all the editing work that I've done. One click, dammit! Oh no! I had no choice but to start from scratch. Aaaw :( 

However, looking at this picture now, I think that it is way cooler than the one that I lost. I mean, WAY cooler! :D 

Often, when we find ourselves in a place of having to start from scratch after all the effort, energy and money that we've invested, it can be hard to imagine that the result of the new effort could be better than the old. It is easier to believe the result of the

Book review: The Daughters of Lancaster County Series (Wanda E Brunstetter)

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Book review: A Hustler's Promise & A Hustler's Promise 2 (Jackie Chanel)

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Book review: Not in the Heart (Chris Fabry)

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30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 30

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare was hosted by Tom Baker during the month of April. I simply like to finish what I've started, so here goes...

Day 30: One question or subject matter if I were asked here on 30 Days of Blogging Honesty I know I would refuse to answer or definitely lie about is...

questions about people that I work with. Just my luck I'd be the one whose boss suddenly develops a curiosity about his staff and "stumbling" upon my blog - the very post where I say what I should never have, 30 days honesty and all... and my sex life of course; some things are none of anyone else's business, yes? ;)

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 29

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare was hosted by Tom Baker during the month of April. I simply like to finish what I've started, so here goes...

Day 29: My television is showing the same show on every channel. I really don't mind watching _____________ (from the 1960's) and I really love this show because...

Hmm... 1960's... I wouldn't know, really, since I was only born in the 1970's. Don't recall much about the telly even then. 

Mangwanani: An appointment with heaven

I didn't know that heaven had several addresses around South Africa. A piece of heaven is exactly what Mangwanani African Spa's offer and today I was privileged to have a taste of it when I visited their Indaba branch in Fourways, Gauteng. After the week I've had I needed it more than ever. My heart is so grateful for the angels that God has surrounded me with in this season of my life. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

My visit to Mangwanani was a gift voucher for a afternoon half day spa - perfect! I could sleep in till 9am and have a lazy breakfast and bath before heading out to the spa - a roughly 45 min drive. The last thing I wanted to do was having to get up at 6am to be on time. Believe me, it is not the kind of appointment you want to be late for.  

The "pearly gates"

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 28

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare was hosted by Tom Baker during the month of April. I simply like to finish what I've started, so here goes...

Day 28: If I could do one thing that is socially unacceptable and know I would not be judged, I would...

say what I really think more often.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 27

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare was hosted by Tom Baker during the month of April. I simply like to finish what I've started, so here goes...

Day 27: I have an inner voice, and if a friend spoke to me the way my inner voice does at times, I would... 

have a lot more friends :)

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 26

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare was hosted by Tom Baker during the month of April. I simply like to finish what I've started, so here goes...

Day 25: I would break the law to save a loved one if...

I wouldn't break the law; not for anyone; not knowingly, intentionally. I would do everything else in my power and knowledge, but my first loyalty would be to do what honors God. I trust that he would honor my heart attitude and answer my prayer for grace and assistance when I ask Him instead. "A life of doing what is right is the wisest life there is." (Proverbs 4:11) ... "if you live that kind of life you will not limp or stumble as you run. Carry out my instructions, don't forget them, for they will lead you to real living." "Despise God's Word and find yourself in trouble. Obey it and succeed." (Proverbs 13:13) What a wonderful promise!! I believe that God is a God who honors His Word... and those who keep it. If He could split the Red Sea, I don't see why He couldn't save my loved one without my having to dishonor Him.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 25

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop on over and check out this blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 25: My biggest pet peeve that has nothing to do with blogging, being online, computers or anything else related to the internet is...

Hmm... pet peeve...

Wiki-answer.com defines it as your favorite minor complaint (when something or someone's actions really irritate you and you just can't stand it; it could be irrational and not annoy anyone else; it can be different for everyone.)

Without over thinking this question, I'd have to say I get really (and often) peeved with people who behave as if they're on the planet alone. Some examples of this:

Source: SKN Vibes
Some may think this is funny; I wonder from the point of view of the person on the lawn. Why don't you get out and let me drive; see how you like them apples?!

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 24

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 24: Given the choice between having to live the rest of my life without my voice, or living the rest of my life without the ability to hear, I would choose...

Wow! What a tough question. I mean really tough! I pray that I will never in my life have to make this choice for real, but for the sake of answering this question I think I would choose to be without my voice.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 23

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 23: Allowing another person to fully love me means I must...

be able to say what is really on my heart. When I speak, I share a little piece of myself. If you don't get that  about me then you're the wrong person for me; and if I can't share myself with you, what is the point exactly? If you can't be yourself, then there's no relationship, is there? No real relationship anyway. (Of course the reverse has to be true also. A one sided relationship is also no relationship, not so?) I already love myself - I, me and myself get on like a house on fire - but the question specifically says "another person" ;)

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 22

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 22: Allowing another person to fully love me means they must...   be trustworthy.

How do you allow someone to love you, or feel safe in their love in they cannot be trusted? I cannot share myself if I don't feel safe. I'd always be stuck in a halfhearted situation where I don't feel like I can just let go, and the other person will always be stuck at arm's length. 

Sure, allowing someone to love you involves risk, but if someone carries a gun and you know that they don't hesitate to shoot, you don't exactly jump up and down screaming, "shoot me, shoot me!" If someone hurts you over and over again in the same way I also think that it says something about their love. After all, you know a tree by its fruit, yes?

Book review: Intimate Strangers (Laura Taylor)

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30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 21

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 21: The person or persons that do not read my blog, but I wish he/she/they would, is...

I read a few people's blogs and I comment because I think that you should sow what you want to reap. I would like for my blog to be more interactive - more than reading it, I want for people to actually share their thoughts/comments. I think I would like for those whose blogs I read to also read mine. 

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 20

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 20: I'm half naked, cold, tired, hungry, hurt, wet and just washed up on a deserted island. The first things I need to do to survive is...

Ok. Half naked - that's not too bad. Let's assume that the most crucial bits are covered and it is summer time. Yes, I'm cold, but I've just washed up on a beach; maybe I'm in a bit of shock. Hopefully I'm not too hurt to move/walk.  Of course I'd have an appetite but I can go without food for longer than I can go without water, so I'd say my first thing I need to do to survive is find fresh water. With that I can quench my thirst so that I don't dehydrate, and I can clean wherever I'm hurt so that it at least has a better chance of getting better. 

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 19

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 19: The film that best describes how my day-to-day life feels is...

It's a story of destiny - searching for it, discerning it, questioning it, suffering for it and following it (even if it means sometimes going at it alone). It is a story of courage.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 18

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 18: I would agree or disagree that high school is/was the time of my life... Because...

I would highly disagree!

I don't spend a lot of time pondering these years of my life, but every now and again a painful memory rises to the surface and rattles my cage a bit. Thankfully I'm older and wiser now and I know how to knock it back in it's place - the past - dead and buried, where it belongs.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 16

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 16: I've just been granted the power of resurrection but I can only use it to bring back one dead celebrity. I would bring back ___________ because...

I remember the morning that I woke with the news reader announcing on the radio that Michael Jackson was dead. Geez, what a way to wake up? I remember wondering whether he couldn't use a better word as supposed to dead. It sounded so cold, so heartless, so final. Then again, death is final, isn't it? (For life on earth anyway.)

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 15

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Hop along over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 15: Given the choice between infinite time or infinite money, I would choose...

Hmm... infinite time... I take it that would refer to infinity on the earth? In that case I'd have to go for the money. In reality I believe that I will live forever - not on the earth, but no matter what happens - with Jesus in eternity. It is one of the promises that God makes to every child of His. However, I could think of a few things that I'd like to do with money while I'm on this planet. You see, I won't need any money where I'll be living forever, so I'll have that now, thank you very much.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 14

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 14: Because my parents never found out, I remember getting away with ___________ as a teenager...

"Getting away with" gives me the idea that it would be something that they would not have approved of. I was too busy doing everything right, thinking that perhaps that way I could earn love and acceptance. Stepping out of line (1) didn't make sense to me - I've always been very consequence conscious - and, (2) would mean rejection - the very thing that I tried to avoid at all cost till a few years beyond my teenage years. A few moments of indulgence would ruin the greater objective. In my mind I simply couldn't risk that, so I "colored inside the lines". 

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 13

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 13: I once got so drunk and lost control and this is what I was told I did and have no reason to doubt it...

I can't decide whether this is an easy question or a boring one. Easy because I've never been drunk before - I've been tipsy a few times, or boring because I don't see the point in getting drunk and have no "exciting or fun" stories to tell. I suppose if you're looking for one of the latter, you've definitely come to the wrong place.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 12

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging date is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 12: My favorite song to dance and sing to when no one is looking...

In all honesty I'd probably have to classify all songs under this category - when no one is looking. As much as I love to sing, I battle a bit with stage fright. It would seem that the moment I realize that anyone's attention is focused on me, my voice gets caught in my throat and my knees start shaking. I do think that I have a good voice, but my desire to meet the expectation for performance is so overwhelming, and I want to get it right so badly, that I actually - I suppose - mess it up for trying too hard.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 11

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 11: When I've had a really bad day the first thing (not person) I reach for is...

When I've had a really bad day it usually means that I was upset often - or perhaps mostly - and when I've had a day like that I would often end up with a headache and feeling physically tired - a combination of venting my emotion when I had the chance, and having to pretend and keeping my pose the rest of the time - something that can be extremely exhausting for me.

On days like this - and under normal circumstances - I don't just reach for one thing, but three: candles, bubble bath and my bath pillow.

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 10

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

It's been a few days since I've last been honest, but I'm grateful to be able to catch up over the weekend. Work hours have been so hectic, and by the time I do get home at night, I have just enough energy left to eat, have a bath and drift off into unconsciousness before it starts all over again the next morning ~ forget about being creative. But it is weekend now, so without further delay I present to you, ladies and gentlemen...

Day 10: The last time I snooped into something I wasn't supposed to (like a medicine cabinet in a friend's bathroom), I found...

I've been thinking about this question for a few days, so I decided to start by checking the meaning of the word snoop to begin with, and it is defined as:

Snoop ~ pry (to pry into other people's business or affairs, especially surreptitiously) ~ noun ~ somebody who pries into other people's lives / a surreptitious investigation of somebody's private life or property.

OK, so what does surreptitious mean? That sounds like an important part of the definition...

30 Days of Blogging Honesty Dare - Day 9

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 9: When the cashier gives me this amount of money for change I know it's too much money to dump in the charity bucket...

When it comes to giving I try to be sensitive to what is in my heart to do. I believe that, as much as it is important to give, as much is it important with what attitude you do it. I don't think that resentful giving bears blessing. How do you feel when someone gives to you with a There! Take it! attitude? I don't know about you, but it makes me feel like saying, Rather keep it - thanks, but no thanks. 

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Day 8

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 8: If I could afford it, the piece of famous artwork you would find in my home is...

I'm not really into art in this way. I suppose this sort of ties in with my lack of desire to follow trends. I've honestly seen some Van Gogh works and I simply cannot understand why anyone would spend that much money on one of his paintings. Even if I was a millionaire I wouldn't be reaching for my wallet.

I look at something creative and it either appeals to me or it doesn't - who created it is of no significance / relevance to me.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

One line made me want to see this movie: "How do you stand this country; what do you see that I don't?"

In essence I would say the theme of the movie the challenge of dealing with change; not just surviving in it, but thriving - that is true success. It is about accepting that things don't ever stay the same and we can't know what the future hold, except that it will be different. 

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Catch-up (Day 7)

This 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun - and sometimes challenging - dare.

Day 7: I went to see a psychic, and was given the opportunity to ask three questions - I would ask...

Am I curious about what the future holds? For sure, I am! However, I also have to admit that there are some things that I honestly don't care to know. When I was younger I used to be a lot more curious. I would almost not rest if there was something that I felt I just had to know. Eventually, more often than not, I would regret finding it out. Only problem would be then that you cannot "un-know" - not that there is such a word, but you know what I mean. Whichever word you use, you would then be stuck with knowledge that you wish you rather didn't have. Eventually it helped me to learn to sometimes not even bother pursuing finding out. I found that my life was a lot more peaceful that way and I was able to adopt more of a cross the bridge when you get there approach.

Days like these

Do you ever get the feeling that you're not supposed to go somewhere, or do something?

I've been working really hard lately - long hours in the midst of tremendous change. I've had nothing else on my mind besides work - either solving current problems, or planning how to solve ones that I don't even know exist - but this weekend is a long weekend (Easter) and I'm determined to have nothing to do with work till Tuesday next week. (It didn't even really occur to me that not everyone in the world celebrate Good Friday anymore.) 

This weekend couldn't come at a better time for me. I desperately need to rest and to bring some balance back to my life; to have some fun! I thought I'd go out for lunch and watch a movie, so I checked the circuit, made my selection and grabbed my bag and keys. I was so looking forward to it.

Things didn't quite go according to plan.

30 Days Blogging Dare - Catch-up (Day 6)

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun challenge.

Day 6: My worst cooking disaster involved ________________ and this person/these people...

A question like this really makes me take a long, hard look at my life and then I realize that I don't have the stories to tell like others do. I haven't cooked for many people in my life - there haven't been many around. I've been the single one and others have had husbands and families, so everything usually revolves around them, their homes, their cooking, their families. It is not that hard to mess up a meal for one. It doesn't require cook books and foreign recipes or strange ingredients. What is there to mess up, really?

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Catch-up (Day 5)

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants in this fun challenge.

Day 5: This is embarrassing but on average I cause the toilet to overflow about this many times a year because of deposits I made...

This is a strange topic, but thankfully this has never happened to me. In fact, I can't remember the last time I've seen a blocked toilet. 

30 Day Honesty Blogging Dare - Catch-up (Day 4)

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants.

Day 4: A blogger friend I've known for over five years told me she has been blogging anonymously all this time and most of what I know about her is her fantasy. My reaction to the news is...

First off, let me just clarify that this is a hypothetical question for the sake of the honesty dare.

This is such an interesting topic. When I first read about it on Happy Isn't Always A Fairy Tale I thought that it was a real scenario and it really kicked my brain into overdrive.

30 Day Honesty Blogging Dare - Catch-up (Day 3)

The 30 Days Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants.

Day 3: Regardless of my current status, do I believe a person should save themself for marriage...

Yes, I do.

Sadly, I only got this right once: I married a virgin. Since then I have gotten divorced and this matter has been an issue in every relationship since. None of the very few and far between relationships since then have resulted in another wedding, but the ones where there were no sex beforehand were certainly the better ones - note I said better, not best, or I would have been married by now.

30 Day Honesty Blogging Dare - Catch-up (Day 2)

The 30 Day Honesty Blogging dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop on over and check out his blog, including a list of the other participants.

Day 2: Not including food, blogging or television, my most guilty pleasure (this includes chocolate)...

Hmm... guilty... I feel guilty about way too many things, and in 2012 I am determined to be rid of some of that guilt. 

30 Days Honesty Blogging Dare - Catch-up (Day 1)

Not too long ago I started reading a blog called Happy Is Not Always A Fairy Tale. I've been a little inundated at work, so I only discovered that she had taken up the 30 Days Honesty of Blogging dare around day 4. Being as opinionated as I am, I obviously had a lot to say, so instead I decided to participate in the challenge myself. I know I have a bit of catch-up to do, but rather day 5 than 15, right? 

This dare is hosted by Tom Baker. Pop over to his corner of the world and check it out! So here goes...   

Day 1: The one thing that it seems like everyone else on the planet is into but I just cannot stand is...

At first I tried to wreck my brain thinking of that one thing, but then I realized that I have a problem with following trends period! If everyone else is into it - whatever it may be - I'll usually have no interest in it whatsoever.

I choose to think for myself and do what suits me; forget what everyone else is doing. If anything I want to be the one setting the trends, rather than following them. Even if not one soul follows me, I'm still doing what I choose - as should everyone else be free to be themselves. (Sadly many don't know who they are anymore, then how do you embrace that freedom?)

Book review: Hostile Witness (Rebecca Forster)

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Ford Fiesta - then and now

I was staring out of the window today when it suddenly dawned on me... Don't you agree that something simply beautiful has happened to the Ford Fiesta?

Before (1996)

After (2011)

If you ask me, I think they've certainly done something very right!

Working for peanuts

Little Bubbles has been as much in transition as I've been; a few months here, a few months there. We've met some interesting characters along the way and I'm pleased to see how adaptable he's been so far. Some parrots really don't like change - not even a new toy in their cage, or even rearranging the same toys. I've read that it can take a day or two (or several) to gradually introduce change to their environment, depending on the particular bird. Bubbles, my baby, you've done really well!

Below is a picture of Mufaza, Box Man and Bubbles in his make shift pozzy (slang for 'home'). It makes sense to me that Bubbles needs to find new ways to amuse himself, seeing as he doesn't have his large 'villa' (cage) with all his usual comforts and toys. Mufasa seems to suffice. 

Talking about the weater

One of the main reasons for my relocating to Johannesburg, South Africa fifteen years ago was the climate. Summers are warm, but not too hot, although we do have the odd scorcher every now and again. And although it can be humid while a good rain storm is brewing, it is not the norm. This means I can wear my long, thick mane down most of the time - just the way I like it - and no frizzies! I wasn't blessed with 'wash-and-wear' and humidity does not exactly bring out my best hair fashion statements ;)

Winters can be cold enough but it is manageable most of the time. I'm not crazy about the cold temperatures - although I've changed my mind a little after my recent visits to the United States with their snowy winters - but I do think that winter is a beautiful season! It is as if the sun shines brighter and there is something comforting about letting it warm your face on a cold day.

Autumn has never been a very pronounced season for me. Maybe because I haven't seen too many trees exchange their green jacket for flaming reds, orange and yellow. This perception changed once again as fall is somehow a lot more prominent in the US. People flock to specific areas merely for admiring the beautiful colors; in the really beautiful parts like Pennsylvania and Colorado (only two of many) it is almost part of a tourist attraction. We even took a trip to Colorado in 2011 for the sole purpose of

Book review: Noble Vision (Gen Lagreca)

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Book review: Into the Free (Julie Cantrell)

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I'll change the day I...

Birds of a feather... (original source unknown)

"I'll change the day I meet a good woman," he said.

Hmm... what kind of stupid statement is that? Yet, I wonder how many foolish men are making it nowadays.

Here's a few random thoughts from a long-standing single girl, for anyone who is interested...

Okay, so you drink yourself into a drunken stupor on every off day that you have. Because you're drunk you can't really go anywhere - thank goodness you're responsible enough to want to stay home. (Some are a lot more stupid and careless than you.) When you're drunk you're useless conversation, and an even worse listener - no one has to check the lights to know that no one's home; I don't know about you, but that makes conversations with my couch more emotionally fulfilling than talking to you, staring at me with glazed over eyes.

Book review: Border Crossings (Michael Weems)

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Book review: Full Cirlce (Mona Ingram)

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